A vast range of emotions are experienced as couples face divorce. These emotions can range from fear, relief, sadness and even anger that can play a part in your divorce but the main concern is how you allow the emotions to affect your divorce and the decisions required of you.
Anger is an emotion that can feed off of itself and due to the intensity, can not only devastate your emotional but your financial well-being as well. When anger is allowed to control your emotions during and after divorce proceedings choices made may directly affect the well-being of both.
Listed below are four ways that anger can become The Financial Monster of Divorce:
- Many individuals express the need to tell their marital and divorce story to someone. Often times, the story is told to every professional who is on their divorce team. What many do not realize is that although personal story telling may be therapeutic in nature, it may not need to take place at every appointment and with every professional. No matter how angry that you are about your situation, remember that every tick that the clock makes during your appointment time, divorce expenses are rising which may later wreak havoc on your emotions as you attempt to figure out how to pay for the multiple times of telling your story. It would be wise to limit your story telling to someone other than your professional unless it is your counselor.
- Anger is often equated with revenge and the spouse who has chosen to file for divorce may already be experiencing anger and revenge. The spouse that may not be at the point of acceptance of divorce, may not be at the stage of revenge but it often follows in time. Anger can creates acts of revenge that may costs in every sense of the word. Anger can evoke an unwillingness to agree to work with the spouse toward a divorce proposal which would be satisfactory to both parties. Anger can also evoke behavior which is unacceptable by the law. Anger can cost a spouse in multiple ways, therefore, always make sure to keep your anger in check.
- After the final decree has been signed, many spouses just can not seem to “let go” of anger. This spouse seems to allow anger to “spill over” into the co-parenting relationship which often impedes the productiveness of parenting. This anger may limit future personal growth to create a new identity and when there are children involved, one spouse may feel the need to always file a motion in court against the other spouse. This may seem to give a sense of revenge and power over the other spouse especially if one spouse is in more of an economic advantage.
- Handling emotions when making divorce decisions is a must. Thinking clearly about assets, liabilities and not just what is desired but the reality of what can be afforded is a must. The foresight of your ability to think about the future and how to encompass it with informed decision making will be best attained if you are able to lay the emotion of anger aside throughout the decision making process. Do not allow the emotion of anger to cloud your judgment and decision making ability.
Learning to deal with anger away from the divorce process may not only aid with your sanity of mental health but also assist with the financial beast that divorce aftermath can bring.
Divorce Tool Box is aware of emotions often experienced during divorce and how they often impede the financial outcome. View our website today to see our online sessions can assist through the divorce process @ www.divorcetoolbox.com